During the afternoon and evening I spoke over the phone with two of the four friends I am having the issues with.  They were really hard conversations.  I'm not sure what will become of these two friendships in the future.  And one of the ladies I had felt I really had a close connection with at one time...so that is the hardest to deal with for me.

          So in the evening I still had to go to choir rehearsal.  Craig now has golf on Wednesday nights, so the girls will be in the nursery when I'm in choir. This was Katie's first time staying with someone besides my inlaws.  Heather (the college student working the nursery) said she did pretty well except right at the end when she became sad. It was really hard for me to leave them tonight.

 

May 3 ~ Kate has been sick today.  Diarrhea, congestion, fussiness...we actually think she may be teething.  I thought I saw a couple of teeth surfacing, but it is hard to tell.  Nat didn't start getting teeth until later...like at around ten months old or so. 

     The third friend of the group of four I am having problems with lately asked to meet me somewhere to talk in person. I really appreciated that she wanted to see me face to face.  So we met at Starbucks for coffee.  I am really glad I got to speak with her - she assured me our friendship was fine and talked real openly and constructively with me.  It was a great help.

 

May 5 ~ The issues with my friends continue...

I had one more friend I needed to speak with - friend #4 also wanted to speak face to face, so we met for lunch at Pancheros. It was a very similar conversation to what I had with my other friend the day before.  Again, she could see all sides of the situation and really dealt with me in a constructive way - the way I'd expect a friend to be.  She said she'd be willing to try and keep me accountable so that this whole fall-out with some of my friends doesn't consume me.  Like I said before...not sure where this is all going to go from here...I feel I have adequately said all there is to say on my end and have done it with all sincerity.  I don't know...I'm not sure I'd ever feel comfortable sharing myself fully with these ladies again...I feel kind of like a fool for opening myself up to them in the past. Plus, two of the girls have said that they really don't want to talk so much about marriage, children, and motherhood anymore.  While I totally realize there are other topics that are interesting, these topics are really close to my heart and make up quite a large portion of my life. I want to be free to discuss those topics if need be...and I'm not sure if that would be acceptable to them. I think I should just make it a point to step back now and see where it goes...it does feel good though to know that at least two of the four friends are still interested in my friendship.  Right now I'm just going to concentrate on my family and our well-being and just enjoy anything else that comes my way.  Craig has been extremely supportive through all this - but all this drama has been hard on everyone in my family, so I'm glad that the worst is over and we can move on.

 

~ ~ Dear Lord, it has been a hard couple of days. Thank you so much for staying near me and carrying me through these trials. Please continue to be with me each and every day, and keep reminding me that my worth comes from being your child and in nothing else. Please forgive me for the times that I have felt a lack of contentment and for the times that I have been a negative person. I thank you that even in my shortcomings, you allow me to run to you time after time and I am forgiven. Only you know the plans regarding my friendships - I now give it over to you - I know that I cannot do this all on my own.  Amen. ~ ~

 

May 6 ~ Craig had to go into work for awhile tonight.  His group moved cubicles again so he had to do some of that plus some actual work.  Nattie and I were eating dinner at the table and she said to me "Mom, you're a good cooker!"  I guess it didn't matter that we were having frozen corn dogs and left over rice! :)

 

May 7 ~ Natalie had her second night of soccer tonight.  She even got to try her hand at goalie...didn't quite know what to do in front of the net, but it was neat. More often than not, Nat could be found on the opposite side of the field either watching an airplane fly overhead or attempting to make friends with someone on the opposing team!  I love tiny tot soccer!  My friend, Sara, said it would be a hoot...and it is!  I am really happy though for Natalie that she can have fun doing something physical and also be with other children. Katie enjoys herself while napping in the breeze and the late afternoon sun!  Craig helped out with the team tonight - the coach found out that Craig played soccer in high school so she was happy to have the extra help. It was a good time!

     Ran into our neighbor, Karen Mitchell, after soccer.  She was outside with her daughter, Dakota, who I believe is about 8 months old now.  Karen told us that they recently had to have their dog put down to sleep.  Later at bedtime, Natalie asked me where Cody was. Craig and I had talked earlier and we pretty much believe that there will most likely be pets in heaven since they bring us joy and there is talk in the Bible of other animals in heaven.  I told Nattie that Cody just got really old and was in a lot of pain and now he is in heaven.  She seemed to be totally fine with that answer and said she'd like to see him again someday.

 

May 9 ~ Today I attended that playgroup that Jill Lashmit invited me to be a part of.  Basically playgroup is held every Wednesday from 1pm-5pm.  You come and go as you please just to fellowship with the other moms and let the kids play.  Today it was held at Shannon Greenan's house in Coralville. We hung around there for awhile and then walked over to North Ridge Park for the remainder of the time.  It was hard to tell with women coming and going, but I think at one point there were maybe seven or eight of us moms.  All of the women seemed really inviting and friendly. And I was delighted to see many of them with their cameras at the park snapping pictures of the kids and moms...it is totally something I would do myself!  I talked with each mom and got to know them a bit...asking how old their kids are, where they are from, what their husbands do for a living...that sort of thing.  The majority of the women attend my church...in fact two of them are wives of pastors at our church...Amanda Hobert is the wife of Nate Hobert who is the Pastor of College Ministries and Emily Malone is the wife of Josh Malone who is the Pastor of Young Adult Ministries.  The only real reservations I have with the playgroup have to do with the age of my children - I have pretty much the youngest child (with exception of Jill's son who is 4 months old) and by far the oldest child of the group.  Most of the children are between 10 and 15 months of age. As soon as Kate gets a little older it won't be too bad for her, but I feel a little bad for Natalie. She kind of gets "stuck" hanging out with all these babies...in fact, she did a little acting out at Shannon's house and I think it was because she had no one to play with. But we'll see how it goes. I just really want to get to know these ladies a little more. My goal right now is just to enjoy each moment as it comes up and let God take care of the rest. I'm wondering if these ladies were put in my path for a reason?  I look forward to whatever becomes of it all. 

     I've been listening to the song Grace Like Rain by Todd Agnew a lot lately.  We recently sang that song in choir.  My favorite lyrics being "Hallelujah, grace like rain falls down on me.  Hallelujah, all my stains are washed away - they're washed away."

 

May 10 ~ We spent the day inside today. The girls and I weren't feeling too great...congestion mostly.  Katelyn's diarrhea has gone away completely, but she is still very fussy.  Still not sure if she's really teething or not. Just trying to keep her comfortable most of the time.  Natalie did go to preschool in the morning though.  She came home with the sweetest Mother's Day card she had made!  It is my first homemade card from my first baby! 

 

 

 

~ is developing a really close bond with her stuffed giraffe named "Raffie"!  Likes to cuddle up with him.

~ is very, very vocal and lets you know when she wants your attention, wants to be picked up and held,etc.

~ loves her toy keys, Glow Worm, exersaucer, link toys, and crinkly barnyard toy.

~ thinks Natalie is hilarious and loves to watch her dance.

~ likes to grab long hair and pull!

~ her eyes light up when she is petting the dogs.

~ she is so ready to talk...you can tell she just has so much she wants to say!

~ still loves to sleep next to her mom (I really need to work on getting her in the crib).

 

~ recently hugged her sister tightly - grinning ear to ear while simply just saying "together" in such a satisfied tone of voice.  I am so glad the girls have each other!

~ attempted to lead prayer at the dinner table the other night...she clasped her little hands together, bowed her head, closed her eyes and began naming people she was thankful for...then she got frustrated and stopped and said "I don't understand."  We told her that she did a good job and not to worry - that someday she would understand better how to pray.  I really need to pray with her and in front of her more often. (Note to self!)

~ is doing extremely well with potty training now!  She is now pooping on the potty almost every day and claims that it is "better than a diaper!".

~ likes to sing and read to Kate

~ likes to watch out the window while Dad leaves for work in the mornings

 

 

May 11 ~ The girls and I walked over to the playground at Penn Elementary today. Katelyn was content playing toys for awhile, and then napping on a blanket in the shade. Natalie was sure to try out all the playground equipment and was quite the dare devil at times! 

 

May 12 ~ I had a nice little early start to Mother's Day this weekend!  Craig's parents had given me a gift certificate for Zenders Spa way back in December for my birthday.  Of course I wanted to wait until after the holidays and Katelyn's birth to use it, so I decided to book an appointment for the day before Mother's Day.  I tried out their new "steam massage".  Nice!  They basically place this tent of steam over top of you from your neck down and gradually crank it up to 100 degrees over a half an hour time period. Then they give you a few minutes to shower before your massage which lasts about 45 minutes or so.  It felt so great!  Afterwards I walked next door to get a coffee and pastry before heading home.  Craig then watched the kids most of the day while I napped and vegged out.  That is my idea of a fantastic Mother's Day!

 

May 13 ~ Our family had a nice, relaxing day today. Craig took us out to lunch at Red Lobster and then we drove over to the mall and let Natalie run around in the play area.  I received some very thoughtful gifts for Mother's Day...there was a card from my daughters which included their tiny little hand and footprints inside, a beautiful card from my husband, and also a sweet mother/daughter Willow Tree figurine. On a side note - Craig and I discussed plans for our ten year anniversary that is coming up at the end of this year.  I had mentioned at one point that maybe we should just spend a couple nights in a hotel somewhere...just somewhere close and simple...like maybe Chicago or something.  But Craig says that he's been planning to take me on a week-long cruise instead!  We are going to talk a little more about it - but we are working on possibly going in November.  And we are leaning toward the location being the Mexican Riviera.

 

May 14 ~ Beth Cullen, a wonderful lady from Hearts In Touch, invited a bunch of us women over to her house this afternoon. It ended up being me, Jill Lashmit, Monica Neil, and Heather Pentico. Beth and Jill had all their card making supplies spread out so that we could create some thank you cards to send to military men and women overseas. It was really fun to use all the stamps, colorful papers, and other embellishments!  The babies played on the floor while the other children spent most of their time outside.  Natalie had a lot of fun with Meghan (Beth's girl) and Parker (Heather's boy). The Cullens live out in the country in Oxford - they have tons of room to run around outside and just some really great land surrounding their home - beautiful view of rolling green hills from their sunroom window!

 

May 16 ~ On the way home from choir tonight, Natalie was very fascinated with the sunset.  She was watching the sun sink down below the horizon and was curious as to where it was going and what would happen next. She now says that the sun and moon are "best friends" and that they "take turns" rising and sleeping!

 

May 17 ~ Daddy visited Natalie's preschool for the first time today. Craig, Katelyn, and I stopped at House of Aromas for some coffee after we dropped Nat off at school.  It was nice to have that time with Craig before he went in to work.  Before picking up Nat, Kate and I browsed Hobby Lobby for a bit. Katie sat in the highchair for the first time this afternoon!  I could tell how much she liked sitting in the chair...she was just jabbering away and had gigantic smiles. I fed her some rice cereal and she had some mashed up bananas for the first time. She gobbled up every last bit and made all kinds of noises letting me know how tasty it was! 

 

May 18 ~ The girls and I met Craig at Brown Deer Golf Course for lunch today.  There is a little bar and grill type restaurant over there.  Craig watched the kids in the evening while I spent some time hanging out with Jill Lashmit over at her house. She lives in North Liberty. Her husband was out of town for the weekend, so she left an open invitation for any of the moms to come by her home and make some cards and have some girl talk, etc. It was just a really terrific, peaceful time putting together a couple cards and getting to know each other better. 

 

May 19 ~ Choir sang during church services over the weekend.  We combined with the children's choir singing Redeeming King, Your Grace Is Enough, Amazing Grace, Mighty is the Power of the Cross, and How Deep.  I loved singing each one of the songs for different reasons, but How Deep really stood out to me during rehearsals...it reminds me of a lullaby in a way...in fact, I had caught myself humming it to my kids the past few weeks.

 

May 20 ~ Made some cupcakes with Natalie this afternoon.  Some really fun, girly ones with lots of pink frosting and sugar sprinkles. All during the week she kept talking about how her birthday was coming up (it's not till Oct) and how she wanted to have cupcakes.  So she was pretty excited to get her cupcakes!

     My friend, Christi Rock, called me from Florida this evening.  She wanted to let me know that she is getting married back home in Illinois at the end of July! 

    

 

May 22 ~ Since Kate liked eating bananas so much, I thought we'd try some pears today. She is a lot more into eating baby food than Natalie was at this age!  Katelyn is also rolling onto her side a lot more frequently lately and scooting around on her back. She doesn't care much to roll over, but is very interested in sitting up - and she does a pretty good job with support!  She also loves reaching for any object that is near her...especially hair, the dogs, drinking cups, and the remote control!  We've also noticed over the past few weeks that Katelyn appears to have a small birthmark on the right side of her forehead.  It's like a little caramel colored splotch.  At first I thought it was maybe a little bruise from a toy or something, but it's not.

 

May 23 ~ Today was a playdate day, and it was held at Jill's house. Craig took this whole week off work to use up the rest of his paternity leave, so he offered to watch Natalie at home while Katie and I went to the playdate. I figured Nat would have a better time with her Dad, since there would be no one her own age at the playdate. It was me and Katelyn, Jill and her four month old son Abraham, and Lindsay Mann and her ten month old son Carter.  Abe and Kate had a good time "talking" back and forth for awhile. Katelyn didn't really get to meet Carter since she fell asleep right before he arrived and then we ended up having to head on out to get ready for Natalie's preschool graduation.

     Prince of Peace Christian Preschool held a graduation ceremony for all the students tonight.  Her class sang If You're Happy and You Know It together and then combined with the other class and sang a song called He's the King. Each child was presented with a graduation certificate - being a three year old, Natalie's certificate was for completing her first year of preschool. At the end, everyone was invited to sit and enjoy some cake and punch. They passed out programs at the beginning of the ceremony - the teacher had asked the kids some questions and the answers were printed on the program.  One question was "What do you want to be when you grow up?". Natalie's answer was "When I grow up I want to be a princess."  The other question asked was "What is your favorite thing to do at preschool?". Natalie said " Play with the dolls."  It was so cute watching the kids sing and dance!  Craig and I also decided that it makes us feel old and that time is just passing by way too quickly! :) 

 

May 24 ~ Today was Natalie's last day of preschool until this fall.  In the fall she will be attending the preschool program at our church.  I dressed the girls in their matching "Blame My Sister" t-shirts today!  So cute!  Craig and I packed up the van, got Kate comfortable in her carseat and the dogs ready to go, and then we picked Nattie up from school to head out on a weekend trip.  We spent a night in Bloomington and then the next four days/three nights in Indiana. 

     We arrived in Bloomington the evening of the 24th. Got to check out all the new updates Mom and Dad Essington are making in their home. The most recent being that they ripped out all the main level carpeting and installed hardwood floors - it looks fabulous!  Craig and I dropped the dogs off at Gaye's TLC Kennel for the weekend...a very nice place (I believe in or near Hudson, IL) where Craig's parents used to board their dog.  I was a little worried about Bailey and Brigit, but everything turned out fine. After dropping them off we all had pizza and the girls got baths.  Then Craig, Nat, and I went with Grandma Essington to pick up Michael at the train station.  Natalie loves going to meet her uncle at the train station :) 

    

May 25 ~ Craig and Mike played a game of golf over at ISU golf course before we loaded up the van once again in order to make it to Indiana before dark.  Natalie and Mike rode with us, while little Katie spent the night and had a little slumber party at Grandma and Grandpa's house. They weren't coming out to Indiana until the following day. We all stopped at a TGIFridays for dinner before arriving at Denny and Wanda's house in Lafayette, Indiana. Denny and Wanda had invited us back out to their house to spend a couple days with the family and go to the Indy 500 race...we made this trip for the first time last year and it was such a fun and relaxing time that we couldn't hesitate doing it again this year!  Denny and Wanda are Craig's uncle and aunt - we don't get to see this side of the family as often anymore, so it is wonderful to visit them!  Cousin Tanner also stayed for the entire weekend...Natalie had such a blast having a playmate all day every day!...she was so exhausted each night as a result!  All of Roxanne's kids were there the first night - Tanner and Taylor played toys with Natalie, Tristyn played Craig in air hockey, and Tarryn kind of kept to herself on the computer upstairs. Nattie was zonked out by the end of the night...we made her a cozy little nest of blankets on the floor in our room.

 

May 26 ~ Soon after breakfast, Natalie and Tanner were eager to go outside and play.  First, they wanted to see the horses, goats, and donkey out back. Natalie was frightened by the animals last summer - pretty much the same story this summer, but she did at least attempt to touch them somewhat. Denny, Mike, and Craig spent the morning and afternoon golfing together. Wanda and I spent the afternoon watching the little girls play.  They spent some time in the driveway playing with balls and wagons and riding the four-wheelers. Before we knew it, Grandma and Grandpa Essington were pulling into the driveway.  It was so nice to see my baby Kate (aka: Lovebug!) once again!  The boys soon came back from golf and we all ate dinner together at the house. Roxanne came by in the evening with her new pet piglet, Eddie.  After that we all went out to the barn to watch Denny and Wanda put the animals away for the night.  Natalie liked to observe, but was not interested in riding any of the ponies. Before bed we celebrated Michael's May birthday with a cake that Mom and Dad E brought over.

 

May 27 ~ Today was the Indy 500!  Denny, Michael, Craig and I went just like last year.  We arrived quite a few hours early in order to walk around and check out the vendors and exhibits and such. It was raining in the morning, but they soon had the track dry by the time of the race. What happens is that when it stops raining, these trucks whip around and around the track and there are also trucks pulling these huge blowers as well.  It takes about two hours to dry the track after it rains.  So the race was on!  Actor Patrick Dempsey drove the pace car this year - very neat. And there were three women drivers this year - also very neat.  The race wasn't even halfway through and it started to pour down rain.  Three hours later (and many snacks later) the track was dry once again and the race was on for the second time!  But soon another bunch of clouds started to roll in, so that made for a very interesting race. What I was told is that they only have to finish like 100 laps to make an official race...and once the rain was to hit again, that would be it since it would take too long to dry the track for a third time that day (no lights on the track).  Basically there was a big crash somewhere around lap 162, the rain started to come down, and the race ended at lap 166 with Dario Franchitti as the winner.  We got poured on!  It was a big soggy mess all the way back to the truck, but it was still a good time!  But I did the stupidest thing ever - I did not wear sunblock that day.  Why??  I really can't tell you...I think my mind has become mush over the years...where was my common sense?  Anway...

 

May 31 ~ I decided to take the girls to Cedar Rapids today for some fun.  Since it was cloudy and rainy, we were going to go to this place where they sell those big wooden swingsets for your backyard...they have open playtime on their indoor floor models during the weekdays.  Well, I couldn't for the life of me find the place!  So by that time it wasn't rainy anymore, so we just stopped at a local park (Thomas Park in Marion) and then had some lunch.  Nat found a little friend to play with while at the park, and Katie got to swing for the first time in one of those bucket swings! 

     Katelyn finally rolled today!  Yay!  Actually, she rolled for the first time front to back this morning and then for the first time back to front this afternoon. Can you believe we missed both of them though??  All we know are the positions she started from and the positions she ended with :)  Kate has been growing up so fast lately.  She had applesauce for the first time today and she is such a good eater!  She gives me big, wet, open-mouthed kisses on the cheek now...I love those!  She grabs my entire face with her two little hands and just suction cups her mouth to my cheek.  And as the baby drool runs downs my face onto my shirt...it is the most beautiful feeling in the world...